Parts of me are healing faster than others making for an awkward time that reminds me of the scene when Bambi tries to stand up all wobbly legged on ice (except with narcotics).
I'll let you know the specifics of it, not to complain, but so maybe you can say a small prayer or send out some good thoughts. Mostly things are progressing well but other things are quite difficult.
I have been dropping off of my medications rather quickly and realizing that I am fully okay with my pain through the day. My neck is achy (among other things) but I'm not one unaccustomed to pain. Actually, I think because I spent so long with pain that once I had strong drugs in me, I started getting woozy and nauseated. Now that they are all out of my system, I realized I'm okay without them. My eating has even gotten much better.
Through this last week, its been hard to determine how much to cut back and when. (more on that later) But for now I got to a place where I'm drug free, aside from occasional tylenol.
Pains in my...
I think all the weight I lost was in my rear-end. I also think my bony butt is angry at me for sitting around on it these three weeks straight. In fact, my hips and lower back and sides and legs have joined in on the complaints. I didn't think I'd be so sore but my goodness!
During the day I sit up, I move, I stretch, and I change positions. I walk multiple times. I try to answer the restlessness of my body. But I can only do so much before my neck and head need to lay down again. I was pretty active before the surgery (I ran 3 miles the day before the cut me open) and now I think my muscles are not liking the bed bound life they've been forced to lead.
So at night, I just cannot get comfortable. I cannot find a position that doesn't hurt from head to toe and I have that age old problem for me, yet again...
Here is where all those other two things come together. At first I was going back to add some of my medications just at night - maybe they would help me sleep. Instead, I was up all night feeling queasy and sick. Then I tried nights without the medications, and I was up all night feeling pain and restlessness.
Just after coming home from the hospital, I was able to get 1 or 2 hour bits of sleep through the night. Now I don't even fall alseep till around 4 or 5 am and I might get two broken up hours total, if I'm lucky. (Which is to say, this in-between time I've called "limbo" has been rough enough to merit more harsh names, to say the least)
I spoke with the nurse on staff at my surgeon's office and she recommended I do not go back on the narcotics that make me sick - that instead I try tylenol PM tonight. I figured I'd share this with you because I do believe prayer goes well with those little blue tablets.
Like I said earlier, I know this is just a rough patch. Parts of my body are feeling much healthier - in time, other parts will catch up. As I'm able to hold my head up longer and longer, my walks will increase, my aches will go away, and my sleep will get better. I know that. I just really want to get there already. (I'm only 3 weeks into a long recovery, I'm not surprised that its hard, but it is still hard).
Oh and maybe you could send a thought out to Neil too. It's my guess that it can't be easy living with an emotionally raw post-operative zombie that tosses and turns all night.